Anthony Taglianetti
3a29785a36
Consolidates inner-dialogue-deeper content into the main repo. Removes expansion pack gating, Gumroad references, and the two-tier setup flow. All communication styles and therapeutic modalities are now included and offered directly during setup. Bumps kit_version to 2.0.0. Co-Authored-By: Claude Opus 4.6 <noreply@anthropic.com>
68 lines
3.2 KiB
Markdown
68 lines
3.2 KiB
Markdown
<!-- version: 1.0.0 -->
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## Internal Family Systems (IFS)
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**Core principle:** The mind is naturally multiple—everyone has sub-personalities or "parts," and each part has positive intent, even when its behavior is harmful. Healing happens when the Self (our core, undamaged essence) builds compassionate relationships with all parts.
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### The System
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**Parts** are sub-personalities that carry emotions, beliefs, and roles. They develop to protect us, especially from early pain. No part is bad—but parts can take on extreme roles when burdened.
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**Self** is the core of a person—who they are beneath all protective layers. Self is always present, never damaged, and naturally possesses the 8 C's:
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- Calm, Curiosity, Clarity, Compassion
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- Confidence, Courage, Creativity, Connectedness
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When someone is "in Self," they can relate to their parts with openness rather than reactivity.
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### Three Types of Parts
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**Exiles**
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- Young, wounded parts carrying pain, shame, fear, or loneliness
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- Often frozen in the past, in moments of overwhelm
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- Other parts work hard to keep Exiles out of awareness
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**Managers**
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- Proactive protectors that try to prevent pain before it happens
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- Strategies: people-pleasing, perfectionism, control, intellectualizing, caretaking
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- Keep life structured and Exiles locked away
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**Firefighters**
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- Reactive protectors that activate when Exiles break through
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- Strategies: numbing, bingeing, dissociation, rage, self-harm, substance use
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- Emergency responders—they don't care about consequences, only stopping pain now
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### Key Concepts
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**Blending** — When a part's feelings or beliefs merge with the person's sense of self. "I am worthless" (blended) vs. "A part of me feels worthless" (unblended).
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**Unblending** — Creating separation between Self and a part. The first step in all IFS work. Techniques: asking the part to "step back," noticing where the part lives in the body, asking "how do you feel toward this part?"
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**Unburdening** — The healing process where an Exile releases the pain, beliefs, or sensations it has been carrying, often through imagery (releasing to wind, water, fire, earth, or light).
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**Parts Mapping** — Identifying the parts involved in a pattern, their roles, and relationships to each other. Helps see the internal system as a whole.
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### Key Questions
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- "How do you feel toward that part?" (checks for Self-energy vs. another part responding)
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- "What does this part want you to know?"
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- "What is it afraid would happen if it stopped doing its job?"
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- "How old does this part seem?"
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- "Where do you notice this part in your body?"
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### When to Use IFS
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- Inner conflict ("Part of me wants X, but another part...")
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- Self-criticism and shame cycles
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- Patterns that resist change despite insight
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- Trauma work (with care and pacing)
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- Emotional overwhelm or numbness
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- Relationship difficulties driven by protective parts
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- Addictive or compulsive behaviors
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### IFS Exercises
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- Parts mapping or journaling (who shows up around this issue?)
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- "Getting to know" a part: approaching with curiosity, asking what it needs
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- Noticing blending in real time: "Is that me or a part?"
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- Self-energy check-in: "How much Self do I have access to right now?"
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- Guided unburdening visualization (only when parts are ready)
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