3.6 KiB
Compassion-Focused Therapy (CFT)
Core principle: Many psychological difficulties stem from an overactive threat system and an underdeveloped soothing system. By deliberately cultivating compassion—toward self and from self—we can rebalance the emotional regulation systems and reduce shame-driven suffering.
Three Emotion Regulation Systems
1. Threat and Protection System
- Detects danger, drives fight/flight/freeze
- Emotions: anxiety, anger, disgust, shame
- Fast, powerful, designed to dominate attention
- Often overactive in people with harsh inner critics or trauma histories
2. Drive and Resource-Seeking System
- Motivates pursuing goals, rewards, achievements
- Emotions: excitement, anticipation, pleasure
- Can become compulsive (always chasing, never resting)
- Activating but not soothing
3. Soothing and Contentment System
- Creates feelings of safety, connection, calm
- Emotions: peacefulness, warmth, contentment
- Linked to attachment, caregiving, and oxytocin
- Often underdeveloped in people who grew up without consistent warmth
Key Concepts
Compassionate Self — A version of self deliberately cultivated to embody wisdom, strength, warmth, and commitment to alleviating suffering. Not who you are yet, but who you practice becoming.
Self-Criticism → Self-Compassion — The inner critic often developed as a protection ("If I attack myself first, I stay safe"). CFT doesn't fight the critic—it understands its function, then offers an alternative voice.
Shame — A core focus of CFT. Shame says "I am bad" (not "I did something bad"). CFT works directly with shame by building tolerance for it and offering compassionate counter-responses.
Common Humanity — Suffering is not a personal failing. Our brains evolved for survival, not happiness. Many difficulties arise from "tricky brains" we didn't choose and didn't design.
Key Practices
Compassionate Letter Writing
- Write to yourself from the perspective of your compassionate self
- Acknowledge suffering without minimizing
- Offer understanding of how you got here
- Express warmth and encouragement
Compassionate Image/Figure
- Visualize a being (real, imagined, or archetypal) that embodies perfect compassion toward you
- Practice receiving warmth, understanding, and strength from this figure
- Build the felt sense of being cared for
Soothing Rhythm Breathing
- Slow, rhythmic breathing to activate the parasympathetic system
- Typically: inhale for a count, exhale slightly longer
- Used as a foundation before other compassion practices
Key Questions
- "What would your compassionate self say to you right now?"
- "What system is running the show in this moment—threat, drive, or soothing?"
- "What did your inner critic learn to protect you from?"
- "What would it feel like to receive compassion in this moment?"
- "How would you respond to a dear friend experiencing this?"
When to Use CFT
- Persistent self-criticism or harsh inner voice
- Shame (especially chronic or toxic shame)
- Difficulty receiving care, warmth, or compliments
- Trauma histories involving criticism, neglect, or conditional love
- Perfectionism driven by fear of inadequacy
- Depression with strong self-blame component
- When standard CBT thought-challenging feels invalidating
CFT Exercises
- Three-system check-in: "Which system is most active right now?"
- Compassionate letter to self about a current struggle
- Soothing rhythm breathing (2-3 minutes daily)
- Compassionate self visualization
- Rewriting self-critical thoughts in a compassionate voice